Outcome Independence

How irony shapes our lives more than we know.

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Hello and happy Sunday. Today we talk about irony.

I was spurred by a conversation I had with a leasing agent I’m working with at a new building.

It perfectly ties in with my obsession with the classic Elon quote:

“The most ironic outcome is the most likely.”

The initial discussion circled around my lack of enthusiasm to sign a lease in a new building. That is the opposite of exciting to me.

I brought up how I felt about buying my house. Of course it is a significant life event, but nonetheless felt nothing during the whole process. No different than moving apartments.

And I think that’s a good thing.

I am completely emotionally unattached to the actions.

It’s not that I don’t get excited. But if everything is exciting - nothing is exciting. If emotions are high at all times they tend to blend together.

This isn’t an investment discussion either. But the action of buying a home can certainly get emotional from many perspectives. I was (am) outcome independent. I liked the house on paper rather than becoming attached to the shape of the door arches (or whatever reason people fall in love with homes). There would always be another.

That’s what brings me back to the Elon quote. If I was OBSESSED with the home - what’s the most ironic outcome? I put in an offer and some international buyer comes in all cash $50k over asking and I lose the deal.

Irony isn’t a 100% rule, but something to observe in the world. Referencing the tweet above - the outcome here being the only vehicles that qualify for EV credits being the ones that aren’t even for sale.

The lesson here? Outcome independence, a lack of caring, can often be massively beneficial.

This is NOT to say not to work hard. Or focus on a particular path. It’s just when we have tunnel vision on a particular idea - the most ironic outcome tends to be what actually happens.

This can be observed in men obsessing over securing a girlfriend while the more relaxed have never given it much thought - and tend to not be single.

Or when top athletes look like they’re having fun in practice and games. It’s not that they don’t work incredibly hard or are not fierce competitors - many just trust their own abilities and don’t stress the outcome - they’ve developed internal confidence that the outcome will likely be in their favor. Thus avoiding unfortunate irony infringing on their goals.

However, the purpose of this post isn’t to talk about leases, investments, dating, or professional athletes. There’s plenty of TikTok real estate gurus trying to get you to commit your life savings to their Airbnb scheme that “can’t lose bro.”

Rather it is to make a point on caring (in the moment).

So just don’t.

I care deeply about personal health, relationships, and career goals. But I’m completely detached in the moment. So how does that not contradict the above statement? It is about being detached from the outcome.

The best (or worst) part is I notice the exact point when I stop being detached. Emotions become blurred. I’m unable to make better judgements (of course only recognizing the detriment after the fact). I’m less creative, and I have less fun in all of these things when I become attached to immediate success.

This is corollary to flow state. If you’re constantly focusing on success in a particular endeavor rather than just doing it, you will never reach flow.

Similarly, constantly thinking about winning in any of these aspects will take you out of the moment, enjoy it less, thus putting yourself at risk of the most ironic outcome.

I notice this most in beginners start to train. Physical fitness is supposed to be fun right? “Then why do I hate running?” Says the newbie. You’re focusing too much. You’re not just doing it. And of course there’s the fact that just starting out in anything won’t necessarily be fun. There is a learning curve, it’s uncomfortable. You aren’t good at it. So of course it’s not fun.

This creates a weird balance where it is difficult to reach a flow state when you hate what you’re doing (in the early days) so you only think about your progress, creating a vicious loop of discomfort, lack of progress, thinking about every moment, and an ultimate lack of progress.

A lot of this can be mitigated with long time horizons. What is your time scale for success? For most, it is far too short.

It took me a decade to learn the value of doing things with a long time horizon mentality.

But I want it now. I can’t wait 10 years to be good, or make more money, or have a girlfriend/wife, or a new job, or squat 405!

But it doesn’t always take that long. In fact, the only thing that will prolong the time it takes to 10 years, or more, is trying to do it as fast as possible.

Of course the 10 year period is arbitrary - we can choose any time horizon for any of the topics discussed here. But it’s the recognition that day to day progress is miniscule. Getting better at anything takes time. But continuing to do it every day builds a habit, taking our thoughts and emotions out of the mix. With habits comes enjoyment. I know I enjoy routine. I look forward to the things that make my life stable, in an unstable world.

Even more so, often times a lot of the progress isn’t always linear. More likely, it is a flat line of a whole lot of nothing until an exponential spike of progress.

We all know what must be done. The work, obviously. There’s no thought required. There’s no standards associated, no expected immediate progress, and near unlimited time to be amazing at the thing. Finding a way to just enjoy what you do will lead to the greatest returns on your effort, especially when you have no expectation of immediate progress.

Which allows us to just enjoy the act of whatever we’re doing.

Ultimately avoiding irony. Because something must be done.

Cheers.

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DISCLAIMER

This is not Legal, Medical, or Financial advice. Please consult a medical professional before starting any workout program, diet plan, or supplement protocol.